Hello all,

I don't mean to seem so down and negative, but sometimes I can't help feeling like I'm alone in a sea of people. While I have friends and I interact with people everyday, I feel that no one truely understands me. Sometimes I wonder if I'm just weird or not normal--even though I believe the idea of normal is relative, there's an ideal that the general media strives for and I just don't fit.

Most of this is stemming from my lack of luck in the relationships department. While I am having fun being single, I sometimes feel that something is missing. I am aware that this is probably the symptom of coming out of a long term relationship. I know that I am able to hold a relationship, but since I don't casually date around (note: don't misinterpret, I'm not equating that to sleeping around) with various other people, I just feel I'm going to be misinterpreted as not being interested at all.

In my sad attempt to explain: I've ALWAYS gotten along better with guys, and I feel more comfortable getting to know them as friends first without the idea of a dating relationship in the future. So whenever a guy asks me to do something, just me and him, I feel the need to clarify whether its a "Date" or not (Since I feel a date is like stating that you're interested in a relationship-type way). I like to just think of it as hanging out, and IF I am interested, THEN I go to seeing if we can call it a date on other occasions (which is indicating that I may be interested in starting a relationship with them).

However, it would seem that most people see a date as just getting to know each other, without any idea of a relationship at all. Perhaps it's the connotation of the term "date" that automatically makes me think "relationship-potential". ALSO, I am very blunt, which is why I like to ask straight out about things--I feel being "wishy-washy" about things is just asking for trouble.

BLAH...Just felt like ranting. I just don't feel like I can deal with anything related to relationships for awhile--it's SOOOO full of drama and it's tiring as well

And I've avoided homework long enough Hope others out there are having lives less complicated than mine seems to be.